I had put on a suit for this shit. Ironed the motherfucker myself because this was the sixth time and I wasn’t failing again. Plan B was an ugly woman whose tits you cried into. It was Plan A or nothing. Tiger town. Dusty roads like varicose veins on a fat woman’s leg. My arse … Continue reading Flounder →

Holy shit. Camp Gramps looked good. Oiled up and smelling a million bucks, he wrote some bullshit into the multiple social media accounts he had stacked with fake followers and looked at himself in the mirror one more time. He was the lighthouse in choppy seas. The firm hand on the shoulder that said, "Don't … Continue reading Camp Gramps and the Attack of the Hairy Muffs →

There had been something missing in my life, a giant hollow that I was unable to put my finger on or in. It had been there my whole life, gnawing away at my soul like a termite to wood. I decided to join a women’s rugby team. I had seen the advertisement for new players … Continue reading A Lesbianic Rugby Trial →